HOLLYWOOD, USA – Brad Pitt, who in early 2004 promised to "never make movies again" just escaped jail in what must be the most newsworthy event of this year.

Hollywood actor Brad Pitt, who ran amok in late 2003 after being awarded the infamous "Worst Actor of the Decade" and was put to jail for good, is on the run. He escaped yesterday, leaving his guards stupefied.

"He was certainly not rude when he pointed the gun at me," Guard Jackson tells FakeToday, "but even then you could see how badly he tried to play a gangster."

Co-guard Albert Baker, 32, agrees. "That award Pitt received was certainly justified. He used to pretend to sleep in his jail cell, but we knew his shtick and were always under alert."

Pitt was last seen hijacking a black truck heading towards west. He is still dressed as Achilles of movie Troy. His wife, celebrity Jennifer Aniston, was not available for comment.

So how did Pitt manage to escape? Baker answers FakeToday: "He caught me off-guard, so to speak. He was threatening me to impersonate the way double-persona Tyler Durden was smoking in Fight Club, and I just can't stand this kind of clicheed ultra-cool. I handed him over my gun."

By FakeToday correspondent Philipp Lenssen (8/24/2004).